Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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