Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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