Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
