dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
