he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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