with your own penis?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
