i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
operation have a gay friend backfired
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
My vagina just clenched in fear
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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