In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
