we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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