I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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