Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
