Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize