u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
