Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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