I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
foreskin is a definite game changer
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
