Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Houston, we have a blender
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
