hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Randomize
