i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
