so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
tell me about the eggs
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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