I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
There's always time for handjobs
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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