the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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