i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
