I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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