He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
