Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize