Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Is that why you're texting me
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.