she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
The beers last night were like the tears from god
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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