I molested 6 butterflies tonight
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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