you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
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I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
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"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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