you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
