you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
