I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
