Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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