I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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