dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
PANTIES FOUND
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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