tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
worst night to have a conscience
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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