So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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