There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
