Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
