So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
