talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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