Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
