You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
