Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
