If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
