She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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