Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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