Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
