I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
