He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
