This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize