It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
