OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
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i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
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I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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