it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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